❦Clay Coloured❦

Bleak and bland, a bothersome blight.

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Introduction

Glasgow, 7/6/23

Amen, amen. Each night and each day, I wish to be transformed. Flung into space at top speed, burned up and turned into a hard, glassy core rotating on its own axis in space, forever. It never happens. I never turned into a wolf below the full moon's lapping light either, nor did I disappear into the woods to live off of berries and bugs until I died of starvation, unable to be fully feralised. I'm a lap dog, docile and (often) dormant. If it happens, eventually, I hope I reach Sirius. Oh, he will catch me in his tender jowls and I will become myself again. He'll leap into my arms and lick broad strokes across skin burned and blistered by breaking through that blasted barrier called 'atmosphere', and I will bury my face in his soft fur and tell him 'I love you! Yes, oh yes, I do, I do!' To be transformed and to learn what is your truest true, to hibernate and wake back up again. To leave and to return, or choose to move on indefinitely. Away from one and into the arms of another, into the maw of another.

All that to say, I have decided to try to collect all my writing in one place. Or, all might be a bit of an exaggeration; I have made a selection from my back catalogue and will continue to make selections as I go. I predominantly write shorter essays (between perhaps 500 and 3000 words) and somewhat erratic poetry, with a large focus on autofictioning and metaphor. Thematically I'm quite fickle, but history and (pseudo-)historical imagery, interpersonal relationships, bastardised religious/mythological imagery, nature and domestic settings are central to my writing practice. Moving forward I hope to lean into the 'fictioning' part of autofictioning a litte more, and work on developing a few long-form poems that have been in the works for quite some time now. These experiments will end up on the 'Other writing' page. This is a really bad first page, isn't it? I'll figure out what to do with it eventually. Please don't bully my rudimentary html skillz.

'—and daughter, when you are able, come down and join! The kettle's on, and your family's round the table. Will you come down, before the sun is gone?'

©repth